Sunday, January 1, 2006

Goals (Jan 1st) Jenks ward Jan 06

A mother, wishing to encourage her young son’s progress at the piano, bought tickets to a professional piano performance. When the evening arrived, they found their seats near the front of the concert hall and eyed the majestic Steinway waiting on stage. Soon the mother found a friend to talk to and the boy slipped away. At eight o’clock, the lights in the auditorium began to dim, the spotlights came on, and only then did they notice the boy, up on the bench, innocently picking out “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”

His mother gasped, but before she could retrieve her son, the master appeared on stage and quickly moved to the keyboard. He whispered to the boy: “Don’t quit—keep playing.” Leaning over, the pianist reached down with his left hand and began filling the bass part. Soon his right arm reach around the other side, encircling the child, and he improvised a delightful obligato. Together the old master and the young novice held the crowd mesmerized.

In our lives, unpolished though they may be, it is the master who surrounds us, and whispers in our ear time and again: “Don’t quit—keep playing.” And as we do, he augments and supplements until a work of amazing beauty is created.

Naturally, as today is the First day of a New Year, we think of turning over a New Leaf or reaching some aspiration that has evaded us in the past. A new year comes and a variety of things seem possible. For example, this is the year we really will loose 10 pounds. This is the year we will stop loosing our patience with our children. This is the year that we will read the book of Mormon everyday faithfully, even without a specific challenge from the prophet. And, my personal favorite, because I’ve found myself setting this goal every year for the last 6 years, this is the year I will have family home evening every single Monday night.

I’ve asked myself, why is it that I can’t just have family home evening. Or why can’t I just be better at this or that or whatever I’m feeling deficient in? While thinking of these questions, I divided my thought into a few categories. First, straighten your propeller. Second, turn off Saturday morning cartoons. Third, consider the postage stamp.

The great Cunard shipping line of Great Britain has built some of the most magnificent ships in history, but one was extraordinary. Commissioned by the government to build a great military vessel, the shipbuilders constructed one that seemed to be engineered perfectly. Every detail was precise; every piece of equipment was the best available. But one little thing was wrong with the ship. Its great propeller was just slightly crooked—not really enough so anyone could notice, but just slightly askew. And when they took the great ship out for its maiden voyage, the builders discovered something terrible. The ship could not be steered in a straight line. It just went around in circles because of its slightly crooked propeller. Because this fine ship had no direction, it had to be scrapped and sold for razor blades.” (With Maurine Ward, Dimensions of Life, Salt Lake City: Bookcraft, 1979, p. 16.)

The parallel to our own lives is obvious. If we don’t consciously set ourselves in a straight course, we likely will end up going in circles. So ask yourself, where do I want to end up, in what direction to I need to travel, and is my life on course to travel there in a straight line? There are the big picture answers to these questions, which are the most important. Such as I want to end up in the celestial kingdom with my family and I am doing what I can to make sure we all get there. Beyond the grand scheme goals, however, we have our agency to determine what we want to accomplish. For example, do you want to develop a musical talent? A social aptitude? A physical ability? All are worthy goals when set under the larger umbrella of eternal life.
M. Russell Ballard Counsels us . . . “think about your life and set your priorities. Find some quiet time regularly to think deeply about where you are going and what you will need to do to get there. [As in Luke 5:16] Jesus, our exemplar, often “withdrew himself into the wilderness, and prayed.” We need to do the same thing occasionally to rejuvenate ourselves spiritually as the Savior did. Write down the tasks you would like to accomplish each day. Keep foremost in mind the sacred covenants you have made with the Lord as you write down your daily schedules.”
So first, before even setting goals, consider your priorities. If you are unsure of what they are, spend some time asking the Lord for guidance. Even if you think you are on the correct course, taking time to review and ponder your priorities will allow you to make them more a part of your life. Once you are sure of your priorities, you are prepared to make your goals with your propeller on straight. So, how many goals do you set? For me personally, I have found that setting too many goals at once, no matter how good they are, will result in failure. I have found that setting a few goals and then focusing helps me be more optimistic about my chances for success.
Benjamin N. Woodson was a business and financial expert. He set and accomplished many goals through out his life. He suggested, “All you need to do is this: Beginning this very day, stop doing some one thing you know you should not do.” After you have written this one thing down, stop doing it—tonight! Do you understand the assignment? You will write down one thing you will stop doing tonight that is holding you back.
Some of you will have the necessary self-discipline and courage to do this. Others of you will just sit here and say, “Oh boy.” You won’t pay any attention to it and so a month from now you will still be dragging behind you the same habit that is holding you back from being your best self.
Mr. Woodson’s continues on and says, “Start doing . . . some one thing you know you should do!” Write down one thing that you are going to start doing that you have been meaning to do for a long time but that you just haven’t gotten around to. I don’t know what it might be, but place into your life, beginning tonight, one thing that you are going to do that is going to make you a better person.” (M. Russell Ballard, “Do Things That Make a Difference,” Ensign, June 1983, 68)
I would suggest that if you, like me, have a difficult time remember in February the list of goals you wrote down on January 1st that you try this approach. Decide on one thing you will stop doing and on one thing you will start doing. Write them down! We have heard that writing a goal and setting measurable milestones makes us more likely to accomplish it. Regardless of how many goals you set, and regardless of when you set them, double check and make sure that your propeller is on straight so that you don’t find yourself traveling in circles.
Now, once we have decided on specific goals, how can we avoid the experience we’ve all had of failing to reach those goals?

Elder Quentin L. Cook shares this story:
“When our son, Larry, was five years old, I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. He said he wanted to be a doctor like his Uncle Joe. Larry had experienced a serious operation and had acquired great respect for doctors, especially his Uncle Joe. I proceeded to tell Larry how all the worthwhile things he was doing would help prepare him to be a doctor.
Several months later, I asked him again what he would like to be. This time he said he wanted to be an airline pilot. Changing the goal was fine, so I proceeded to explain how his various activities would help him achieve this goal. Almost as an afterthought I said, “Larry, last time we talked you wanted to be a doctor. What has changed your mind?” He answered, “I still like the idea of being a doctor, but I have noticed that Uncle Joe works on Saturday mornings, and I wouldn’t want to miss Saturday Morning Cartoons.”
Since that time our family has labeled a distraction from a worthwhile goal as a Saturday Morning Cartoon.”
Thus, I state as my second thought on accomplishing that which we want to as “Turn off the Saturday morning cartoons.” We all have them, stumbling blocks that impede our progress. For example, one of the reasons I don’t have family home evening on a regular basis is I simply don’t remember to prepare a head of time. Monday night comes and I know it’s time for family home evening, but I haven’t prepared. I could probably remove this stumbling block by giving myself a visual reminder to plan for Monday night in advance. I will try to overcome the distractions that are a natural part of life by doing this for my 2006 family home evening goal.
Elder Cook lists some cartoons that many of us share in common. They include: Those that want to be a good home teacher or visiting teacher but are distracted by TV programs, catalogs, and other media and don’t find time to minister to those they are assigned to teach. Some want to have family prayer but allow little matters to build into discord that make it difficult for the family to kneel together. Some who want to feel joy have become accustomed to exaggerating small imperfections and have lost the capacity to rejoice. And still others are distracted by comparing their talents and blessings with others. (Quentin L. Cook, “Rejoice!” Ensign, Nov. 1996, 28)
The list of Saturday morning cartoons can go on and on. One of the reasons that I like the parallel of weekly cartoons is that these distractions that keep us from our goals come into our lives on a regular basis, like the TV. Once we have accomplished visiting teaching or home teaching, the same goal and the same distractions are there again. What is the best way to avoid a literal cartoon? Don’t turn on the TV in the first place. If there are temptations in your home, maybe certain foods that prevent the weight loss goal, or certain video games that prevent the “I won’t loose patience with my kids” goal, or a huge variety of media that eat up our time and prevent the “I will have family home evening goal,” the best way to prevent the distraction is to not let it in your house in the first place. If you really are serious about accomplishing something, you can internalize it and take the opportunity to look at everything you can do to set yourself up for success.
M. Russell Ballard said, “I believe in the principle that you ought to act “as if” you were the person you would like to become. As you do that, you will grow into that kind of person. Ultimately your very actions, your attitude, will lead you into being the kind of person that you want to be.
Our main goal should be to seek “immortality and eternal life” (Moses 1:39). With this as our goal, why not eliminate from our lives the things that clamor for and consume our thoughts, feelings, and energies without contributing to our reaching that goal? (Ballard Balance)
President Ballard encourages us to eliminate those things that don’t contribute to our goal. Or, in other words, try turning off a few of those cartoons.
Once you have your priorities in order, you’ve written your goal, and you’ve tried your best to eliminate the distractions, I would ask you to consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in its ability to stick to one thing until it gets there.

If you send a letter to Sacramento and the stamp falls off in the Tulsa post-office, the letter probably won’t reach its destination. The same with us, even with the best of intentions, if we don’t stick to the goal, it won’t happen.
A story shared by Elder Rex D. Pinegar goes, “Isaac Stern, the world-famous musician-violinist, was asked by a television talk show host at what point in his life he determined to devote his energies toward a career as a concert violinist. Mr. Stern told of having given his first concert in San Francisco at a young age. Music critics were extremely impressed and predicted a fine future for the promising young talent. With this encouragement, Isaac Stern began preparations for another concert a year later in New York City. The critics were not so kind to him there. It would require a tremendous amount of work, they judged, if Isaac Stern were to achieve success as a soloist.
Dejected and discouraged, the young Mr. Stern boarded one of New York City’s double-decker buses and rode it up and down Manhattan a number of times. He was, in his words, “crying inside” as he tried to decide where he was going from there. Were his critics correct? Had he gone as far as he was capable of going? Should he now seek a profession as just another member of an orchestra?
After his fourth bus ride through the city, he returned to his apartment where his mother was waiting. He had made his decision. “I am going to work, mother—work at my music until it works for me.” Isaac Stern is now acclaimed as one of the finest violinists to have ever played in the entire world. Work is a principle with a blessing.”
Elder Pinegar concludes the story by stating. “Work builds us physically and spiritually. It increases both our strength of body and our strength of character.”
We can’t be afraid of work. Most of us won’t get much in this life if we don’t work for it. In 1 Nephi chapter 18 verse 23, the family of Lehi arrived in the promised land. By verse 24--the very next verse--the people were tilling and planting and as result, they were blessed in abundance. The blessing in abundance came after the work. This principle has not changed today.
Elder pinegar points out that along with hard work, we need to believe. “Believe in God. Believe in yourself. Believe that God is very interested in you as an individual that he is anxious for you to succeed. He has provided in the gospel of his Son Jesus Christ the sure pattern for ultimate success.
When our lives are consistent with his gospel, we receive confidence through his Spirit to meet the challenges of each day. We can say with Nephi: “The Lord is able to do all things according to his will, for the children of men, if it so be that they exercise faith in him. … Wherefore, let us be faithful to him.” (1 Ne. 7:12.) (Rex D. Pinegar, “Decide to Decide,” Ensign, Nov. 1980, 71)
When looking at the three steps of setting our propeller is straight, turning off Saturday morning cartoons, and sticking like a postage stamp, it seems difficult. It is tempting to ask, why bother? I know that sometime I feel like I’m going to fail anyway, so it seems like it would be less depressing if I don’t try.
Elder Curtis R. LeGrand speaks to me when he says “Those seeking the easy path may say, “I want to be perfect someday, but not now. Maybe I’ll be ready when I am older.” This kind of reasoning allows them to avoid getting out of their comfort zones today or tomorrow or the next day. But attainment of perfection requires more than merely thinking about it or wishing for it. We must act.
Though each of us has different abilities and talents, all of us are given agency to decide what and how much we are willing to do to develop them and to improve upon our weaknesses. This agency is best applied through a simple, prayerfully thought-out decision to work on our weaknesses before they are tested rather than waiting to decide daily between good and bad influences in our paths. Such a decision fortifies our resolve to act wisely in the face of temptation. (LeGrand R. Curtis, “Perfection: A Daily Process,” Ensign, July 1995, 30)
So, when we set goals, even though it is hard, we are showing the Lord that we are willing to act, and that we are willing to try. Even though perfection is a long way off, we need the faith to take steps in the right direction. And, as we strive to reach goals we become stronger and more resistant to temptation. Personal growth occurs in the process of setting and obtaining goals, many times we grow more from the process than from actually reaching the goal its self. It’s hard, but we can do it.
I would like to leave my testimony that God lives. Jesus Christ lives and wants us to improve towards perfection. He knows it hard. He Himself faced daunting objectives. But he didn’t shrink. And because he suffered for me and for you, he is available to support us. What He requires of us is that we sit down at the piano and with all of our hearts we try our best o plunk out Twinkle, Twinkle little star. Even if it’s only with one hand and even if we hit some wrong notes, the Master will come onto the stage. His arms will surround you and with His love, the little melody will be turned into a masterpiece. He loves all of us. I know that he loves me because I have felt his love. I want to do my best to sit at the piano and play the music.

Wednesday, September 1, 2004

Magnify your calling Highland Point (Cottonwood 5th) Sept. 4th

A mother, wishing to encourage her young son’s progress at the piano, bought tickets to a professional piano performance. When the evening arrived, they found their seats near the front of the concert hall and eyed the majestic Steinway waiting on stage. Soon the mother found a friend to talk to and the boy slipped away. At eight o’clock, the lights in the auditorium began to dim, the spotlights came on, and only then did they notice the boy, up on the bench, innocently picking out “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.”

His mother gasped, but before she could retrieve her son, the master appeared on stage and quickly moved to the keyboard. He whispered to the boy: “Don’t quit—keep playing.” Leaning over, the pianist reached down with his left hand and began filling the bass part. Soon his right arm reach around the other side, encircling the child, and he improvised a delightful obligato. Together the old master and the young novice held the crowd mesmerized.

In our lives, unpolished though they may be, it is the master who surrounds us, and whispers in our ear time and again: “Don’t quit—keep playing.” And as we do, he augments and supplements until a work of amazing beauty is created.
Good Morning Brothers and Sisters. My name is Jasmine Dickerson. At the request of my husband I’m going to take a few minutes to introduce our family. My husband’s name is Taylor and my son’s name is Brayden. I like cheese enchiladas, scrap booking, and the color red. Taylor likes dishes with pumpkin it them, Kenpo karate and the color blue. We both love to play games. Brayden came into our family on the Fourth of July, 2003. He is perfecting his ability to walk and has recently discovered he likes hard-core sugar such as that found in smarties. He enjoys playing with other little people, especially when they have toys he hasn’t seen before.
Taylor and I have been married for five years. We met on a blind date that actually worked. This fact is even more impressive if you know that the date took place three days after Taylor returned from his mission. I don’t know if any of you remember what you were like right after coming home from a mission. Taylor had the privilege of serving in Tacloban Phillipines, were he wasn’t so fond of the food. We doubled with another couple and for our date the girls took the guys (both recently returned missionaries) to the grocery store to let them choose anything that they wanted us to cook for dinner. Sometimes I still marvel that we had a second date even though I saw Taylor actually hug a box of dried scalloped potatoes and drool over grapes on our first date.
Luckily, we did have that second date and we were serious about six months later, but we had to put a hold on the dating while I spent a semester at the BYU Jerusalem center. Once I got back, we were engaged and then married about a year after we met.
Taylor studied pre-physical therapy at UVSC and I graduated from BYU with a degree in Business Finance. Taylor is currently pursuing a clinical doctorate in Physical Therapy at the University of Utah and I graduated from the U with my Master’s in Business last May. We have just moved from Holliday and are pleased to find ourselves in the Highland Pointe apartments and in this ward.
One of the first things we noticed about this ward was the friendliness. The second thing we noticed was that it seemed most people were new to their calling. Maybe that’s why the bishopric suggested we speak on service or magnifying our callings. Or maybe, he asked us to speak on this topic because he had just given us new callings and wanted to make sure we got the point.
Elder Henry B. Eyring points out three things to remember about our callings. The first is that Callings are from God, the second, we can use personal revelation in our callings, and the third, The Lord will magnify us as we magnify our responsibilities.
1. “First,” Elder Eyring declares, “you are called of God. The Lord knows you. He knows whom He would have serve in every position in His Church. He chose you. He has prepared a way so that He could issue your call. The person who was inspired to recommend you for this call didn’t do it because they liked you or because they needed someone to do a particular task. They prayed and felt an answer that you were the one to be called.”
As we read in Article of Faith number five, “We believe that a man must be called of God, by Prophecy and by the laying on of hands by those who are in authority to preach the Gospel and administer in the ordinances thereof.”
Isn’t it awesome that we can know our callings are from God? We have the blessing of knowing, just as modern and acient prophets that God is taking a role in our lives. We learn from the scriptures the importance of knowing the Divine Nature of our callings. Paul had a testimony of the divine nature of his calling, He declared that God “hath saved us, and called us with an holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began” (2 Tim. 1:9). Nephi declared that he could do what ever God commanded, for he knew that God would prepare a way for him to accomplish the thing which had been commanded (1 Nephi 3:7). And once Alma the Younger was convinced that he had a divine calling to share the gospel, he was able to covert the most humble of the Nephites.
Elder Eyring expands on the idea of being called of God by explaining “You are called to represent the Savior. Your voice to testify becomes the same as His voice, your hands to lift the same as His hands. Further, “Your call has eternal consequences for others and for you. In the world to come, thousands may call your name blessed, even more than the people you serve here. They will be the ancestors and the descendants of those who chose eternal life because of something you said or did, or even what you were.”
President John Taylor also cautioned us about the eternal nature of our callings, “If you do not magnify your calling, God will hold you responsible for those you might have saved, had you done your duty.” (Monson, Ensign 1986)
So our callings, which are from God are eternal in nature. Have you ever stopped to think that the posterity of the person you are teaching in Sunday school might thank you for what you have done? Or that the future children of the young man or young woman you invite to activities will be grateful? Who knows? The grandchildren of the person you home or visit teach may thank you. My grandfather was baptized in his 60’s and now has served two missions not only am I thankful for the home teachers that played a role in his conversion, but those he has served with in the mission field can also thank those who fulfilled their callings.
2….The second thing Elder Eyring points out is “The Lord will guide you by revelation just as He called you. But that guidance will come only when the Lord is sure you will obey. To know His will you must be committed to do it. The words “Thy will be done,” written in the heart, are the window to revelation.”
Boyd K Packer says (Nov 1994 Ensign). “You have your agency, and inspiration does not—perhaps cannot—flow unless you ask for it, or someone asks for you. No message in scripture is repeated more often than the invitation, even the command, to pray—to ask. Prayer is so essential a part of revelation that without it the veil may remain closed to you. Learn to pray. Pray often. Pray in your mind, in your heart. Pray on your knees.”
So, personal revelation is a key in knowing how to serve those we are called to serve. In order to receive that revelation we must pray and then listen for the answers. How will the answers come?
The first way answers come to us is through the Holy Spirit. This is a guidance we can count on if we are searching and listening. The second way answers come is through the scriptures allow us to study the live of the Savior and some of his most devoted servants. Eyring says [The scriptures] have doctrine in them which will apply in every time and every situation. Pondering the scriptures will lead you to ask the right questions in prayer. And just as surely as the heavens were opened to Joseph Smith after he pondered the scriptures in faith, God will answer your prayers and He will lead you by the hand.”
Personal revelation can come in many different ways. My last calling was in the primary presidency. I taught sharing time the first Sunday of each month, which meant it was my responsibility to introduce the monthly theme. I know that some teaching ideas I used are ones I would not thought of, had I not asked my Heavenly Father for help and then study church materials.
3. The third thing president Eyring wants us to remember is “Just as God called you and will guide you, He will magnify you. You will need that magnification. Your calling will surely bring opposition. You are in the Master’s service. Eternal lives depend on you. [The Lord] said that facing opposition would be the lot of those He called. The forces arrayed against you will try not only to frustrate your work but to bring you down.
We are blessed when we magnify our callings. One example of this is the Brother of Jared. He was called by the Lord to lead a group to the Promised Land and he did all that he could to fulfill this calling. As part of his responsibilities, he was commanded to find a way to get air and light for the barges that would carry them across the sea. He prayed for an answer. The Lord told him how to get air into the barges and then magnified the Brother of Jared, perhaps through pondering or scripture study, and a solution was found in 16 small, white, clear stones, which were touched by the finger and the power of God to shine forth in darkness. These stones allowed the Brother of Jared to further carry out his calling. (Either 3:1-6)
Perhaps the phrase You don’t realize what you have until it is gone” applies here. Elder Eyring tells this story: “On the day I was released as a bishop, one of the ward members came to my home afterwards and said: “I know you are no longer my bishop, but could we talk just one more time? You have always spoken words I needed and given me such good counsel. The new bishop doesn’t know me the way you do. Could we just talk one more time?”
Reluctantly I agreed. The member sat down in a chair opposite mine. It seemed to be just as it had been in the hundreds of times I had interviewed members of the ward as a judge in Israel. The conversation began. There came the moment when counsel was needed. I waited for the ideas, the words, and the feelings to flow into my mind, as they always had.
Nothing came. In my heart and mind there was only silence. After a few moments, I said: “I’m sorry. I appreciate your kindness and your trust. But I’m afraid I can’t help you.”
When you are released from your calling, you will learn what I learned then. God magnifies those He calls, even in what may seem to you a small or inconspicuous service. You will have the gift of seeing your service magnified. Give thanks while that gift is yours. You will appreciate its worth more than you can imagine when it is gone.”
As Elder Eyring explains, callings of all kinds come with great blessings. Even those of us without a formal calling, can magnify our efforts. Perhaps you have been called to be a mother or a father or a spouse, or maybe, your calling at this time is to endure to the end. We read in D&C 4:3 “Therefore if ye have desires to serve God ye are called to the work.”

Brothers and sisters, we all have a calling. In fact many of us have more than one. How overwhelming it is to think of magnifying all of those callings and responsibilities we have been given. In the story of the small child at the piano, the audience is captivated by the combined performance of the boy and the master. I testify that to our Savior each one of us is unique. Each one of us has unique talents that we can share with others. We are given callings to help ourselves and others grow. Although at times, we feel that our efforts are merely an attempt at playing a song on the piano, If we can just muster enough strength to plunk out “Twinkle, Twinkle little star to the very best of our ability, the rest will come.

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Mt Olympus ward Oct 04 Waiting for a calling

One of my favorite conference talks was given by Richard G. Scott in October 1995. I came across it during by time at BYU and I keep a copy of it in a file marked “favorite talks.” Many of my comments today come from that talk. We will be moving in little over a week, and seeing as this is my farewell talk for the ward, I thought I would share one of the marvelous experiences I had while I was here.

Taylor and I first moved into this ward in February 2003. We came to church and discovered the ward members to be friendly and accepting. When we first arrived, I was looking forward to receiving a calling and to start serving in the ward. I didn’t receive a calling right a first, but I was pregnant with Brayden and figured it was probably a blessing. After the baby was born, I again began to look forward to getting a calling. I even asked Heavenly Father to help the process along.

Richard G. Scott states: It is so hard when sincere prayer about something we desire very much is not answered the way we want. It is especially difficult when the Lord answers no to that which is worthy and would give us great joy and happiness.

Well, the calling didn’t come and I was a little down about not feeling that I was contributing to the ward. It wasn’t something I will look back at as a major trial, but it was a small trial. I take comfort in the fact that Elder Scott said in his conference talk that when . . .

Trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more (see Prov. 3:11-12). He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion, which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain.

I wasn’t feeling pain from not having a calling, but it was a little stretch and I felt the discomfort. I can recall one particular Relief Society Lesson. The teacher stood up and told us that the topic was on the importance of magnifying our callings. During the course of the lesson, one sister raised her hand and made a comment that went something like this. “We all have callings. Some of us are called to be a relief society president, or a primary teacher, or a visiting teacher, or a variety of other things. However, we have all been called to be members of a family.” That particular comment lodged firmly in my mind. I even can remember who said it and where they were sitting in the relief society room. I decided that I would take it seriously and I began to focus my “calling efforts” on my family. I still wanted a calling mostly so I would have some connection to the ward, but I felt like I was doing what I should be.

Elder Scott points out that our Father in heaven’s invitation, “Ask, and ye shall receive” (3 Ne. 27:29) does not assure that you will get what you want. It does guarantee that, if worthy, you will get what you need, as judged by a Father that loves you perfectly, who wants your eternal happiness even more than do you.

I still went some time without a calling, but then I was called to be a visiting teacher and the second counselor in the primary all in about the same week. I have loved working in the primary. I think my calling is probably the best one in the ward. When I was called, one of the first things I learned was that my responsibility would be to teach sharing time the first Sunday of each month. I was given an outline of the theme for the year and I went home to look it over. As I studied the theme, I realized that this was particularly for me. The theme for primary is My Family Can Be Forever. I’ve always been taught that since I was young. However looking back, I realized, Heavenly Father had given to me, as a gift, a time when my only calling was to be a mother. I looked at that time as a trial, as a time when I didn’t have outlet to make close friends or to feel I was serving. However in reality, this time was given to me to make my testimony of the family rock solid. When I teach in primary and I tell the children about how the family is part of the eternal plan, I know it’s true.

Richard Scott says: The Lord’s plan is to exalt you to live with Him and be greatly blessed. The rate at which you qualify is generally set by your capacity to mature, to grow, to love, and to give of yourself. He is preparing you to be a god. You cannot understand fully what that means, yet, He knows. As you trust Him, seek and follow His will, you will receive blessings that your finite mind cannot understand here on earth. Your Father in Heaven and His Holy Son know better than you what brings happiness.

My early time in this ward was a prime example of the Lord knowing better than me what would bring me happiness and what would help me grow. For that short period in my life, it was the absence of a calling that I needed. Not only was I able to solidify my testimony of the family, I was able to sit back and observe this ward.

Elder Scott explains: [Heavenly Father] will place in your path packets of spiritual sunlight to brighten your way. They often come after the trial has been the greatest, as evidence of the compassion and love of an all-knowing Father. They point the way to greater happiness, more understanding, and strengthen your determination to accept and be obedient to His will.

As I was writing this talk, I realized the packets of light that have been given to me in this ward. In this ward, I have felt the unity of a ward fast. I have been enlightened by the testimonies of those with faith far greater than mine. I have watched widows unite and support each other. I’ve been given the opportunity to pray for members of this ward by name that I have never met. I’ve been able to serve by assisting the relief society with meals for families or funerals. I’ve observed couples that have been married for years treat each other with love and respect that can be lost over time, but has not been lost. I’ve seen the strong children of this ward and many times thought, “I hope my son grows up to be like that.” These experiences have been my packets of spiritual sunlight that have brightened my way. Without knowing it, many of you have pointed my way to greater happiness. I would like to share my testimony that God lives. He is mindful of each of us. He knows better than we what our experience in life should be. Jesus Christ lives. The atonement is real. And through the atonement He is the one who knows what our trials are. Families can be together forever, through Heavenly Father’s plan. And I always want to be with my family. I’m grateful for the organization of the church. I am grateful for wards and I am grateful for my time in this ward. In the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Wednesday, October 1, 2003

Day to Day happiness-Mt Olympus, UT ward Oct 03

At the request of my husband I’m going to take a few minutes to introduce our family. My husband’s name is Taylor and my son’s name is Brayden. I like enchiladas, scrap booking, and the color red. Taylor likes dishes with pumpkin it them, Kenpo karate and the color blue. We both love to play games. Brayden likes sucking on his fingers, his wrist rattle and has recently discovered that he has lips and can use them to make noise.
Taylor and I have been married for four years. We met on a blind date that actually worked. This fact is even more impressive if you know that the date took place three days after Taylor returned from his mission. I don’t know if any of you remember what you were like right after coming home from a mission. Taylor had the privilege of serving his mission in Tacloban Phillipines, were he wasn’t so fond of the food. We doubled with another couple and for our date the girls took the guys (both recently returned missionaries) to the grocery store to let them choose anything that they wanted us to cook for dinner. Sometimes I still marvel that, we had a second date even though I saw Taylor actually hug a box of dried scalloped potatoes and drool over grapes on our first date.
Luckily, we did have that second date and we were serious about six months later, but we had to put a hold on the dating while I spent a semester at the BYU Jerusalem center. Once I got back, we were engaged and then married about a year after we met.
Taylor studied pre-physical therapy at UVSC and I graduated from BYU with a degree in Business Finance. Taylor is currently pursuing a clinical doctorate in Physical Therapy at the University of Utah and I graduated from the U with my Master’s in Business last May. We are currently house-sitting for Dorian and Lila while they serve a mission in Australia. They are doing very well, send their greetings and are now shooting to be back in January.
Brayden came into our family on the Fourth of July, eight days after he was scheduled to. We feel so blessed to have him in our family, and although he is only about four months old, he has taught us a lot in the areas of patience and service. The fact that we have a new baby makes it appropriate that I start my talk with a story from the Friend. The following story was taken from the June 1977 Issue of the Friend.
His parents had named him “Happy-” Happy Horton Hoggle, that is. But by the time he was six years old, everyone called him Never Happy Horton. When Never Happy Horton started school, everyone there soon knew the reason for his name.
That first morning Mr. Barnes, the principal, was at the front door to greet the students. He reached for Horton’s hand to shake it.
“I don’t like to shake hands!” Never Happy Horton said with a big frown.
“I just wanted you to know that I’m here to help you,” said Mr. Barnes with a smile. “I want to be your friend.”
“No you don’t and I don’t want to be anybody’s friend. Don’t you know who I am? I’m Never Happy Horton. And by the way,” Horton growled, “I don’t like school either!” I’m Never Happy Horton, and don’t you forget it!”
“Oh, I won’t,” Mr. Barnes assured him.
Miss Kate, Horton’s teacher, couldn’t forget either after he had come to her class. Horton was sitting in the darkest back corner all alone. “Wouldn’t you like to join us for story time?” Miss Kate asked.
“I don’t happen to like stories,” Horton said as he folded his arms across his chest.
“But this is a very exciting story,” Miss Kate said coaxingly.
“No story is a good story. I don’t even like television. I’m Never Happy Horton, and don’t you forget it!” Horton shouted.
“Oh, I won’t,” said Miss Kate, heaving a big sigh.
At recess the boys needed one more player to make the baseball teams even.
“Come play ball,” Timothy called to Never Happy Horton who was sitting in the middle of a hopscotch square so the girls couldn’t play.
“I don’t like ball games,” Horton replied in an ugly voice. I’m Never Happy Horton. I don’t even like recess, and don’t you forget that either!” Horton insisted.
“Oh, we won’t,” said Timothy with a shake of his head as he went back to play baseball.
“You can’t fool me, Never Happy Horton! You aren’t always unhappy,” said Suzanna, one of the girls who wanted to play hopscotch. You’re happy right now. You’re happy making other people unhappy,” Suzanna said.
“That doesn’t make sense!” cried Horton as loud as he could. “I’m Never Happy Horton, and don’t you forget it!”
“Well, if you’re never happy, why are you sitting in our hopscotch square?”
“Because … well … because,” Horton folded his arms over his chest and frowned. “Just because.”
“Because you’re happy there,” Suzanna said politely. “And so I hereby proclaim you to be Happy Horton.”
“Wait just one minute,” Horton said with a puzzled look. “That’s a terrible name for a boy! It sounds awful! Happy Horton! I hate it!” Horton squished his face together. “Ugh! Nobody is named Happy Horton Hoggle!”
“You are,” Suzanna said. “You and nobody but you.”
“But Happy Horton Hoggle is an awful name,” Horton said quietly.
“Only if you make it awful. After all, being the one and only Happy Horton Hoggle in the world should make you important,” she pointed out.
“Hey, I never thought of that,” Happy Horton said, and the frown almost turned into a smile. “I’m the only Happy Horton I know of.”
“And you’re the only one I’ve ever heard of. That most certainly makes you very special!” Suzanna repeated.
“It does? I mean, yes, it does!” Happy Horton agreed. “I’m Happy Horton Hoggle, and don’t you forget it.”
“Good,” Suzanna said. “With a little practice you’ll make it. Now will you go play ball?”
“Sure,” said Happy Horton, and he even smiled.

Last week after church, Taylor came to find me in the Mother’s room. The first thing he said to me was, the Bishop asked us to speak next week. My reaction was “Great.” Then my husband continued—he wants us to pick our own topics. My Immediate reaction: “Oh great.” Taylor gave laughed at me and said: It’s not hard to choose a topic, just pick something that you have been thinking of for the last week or so. I looked at him and with frustration said: “I haven’t been thinking of anything uplifting in the last few days, in fact, I’ve been in a bad mood.” Good! said Taylor, You can speak about how to overcome a bad mood! Well, while that wasn’t exactly the response I was hoping for, it did start me thinking.

After all, one of the reasons we exist is to find true happiness, also referred to as joy. We aren’t sent to this earth to find a bad mood. Nephi states in 2 Nephi 2:25 that Men are that they might have joy. And, of course, the Lord wants us to be happy. President Hinckley said: “I am satisfied that our Father in Heaven likes to see His children Happy—not miserable, but happy. I believe He wants to see them enjoy the good things of the earth obtained in a righteous way. (Colorado Springs Young Adult Meeting, April 14, 1996.)

There are many factors to consider and requirements to be met when embarking on the life-long pursuit of happiness. I’ve decided to focus on three things that have helped me which are to take, to give and to seek. Or in other words, to take a reality check, to give thanks, and to seek guidance.

First: Take a reality check

Sometimes if I’m not feeling happy at a particular moment, I think I must be doing something wrong or I must be missing out on some big secret. It is important to remember that life is not designed for us to feel complete bliss at every moment. But, if we didn’t have the sad moments, we couldn’t have the happy. As explained by Nephi in 2 Nephi 2:11: “For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so . . . righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one: wherefore if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.” Everything has an opposite. And we are blessed to feel a wide range of emotions while on this earth.

And so the first part of the reality check is that life is supposed to be hard.

Elder Boyd K. Packer explained: “It was meant to be that life would be a challenge. To suffer some anxiety, some depression, some disappointment, even some failure is normal. Teach our members that if they have a good, miserable day once in a while, or several in a row, to stand steady and face them. Things will straighten out. There is great purpose in our struggle in life” (“That All May Be Edified” [1982], 94).

Coleen K. Menlove, a Primary General President said in the April 2000 conference: “. . . Even within the Church there are people who aren’t happy or people who are usually happy but who experience intermittent times of stress, worry, challenge, and discouragement. That, too, is part of the great plan of happiness. Mortality is a time of testing and trial, which means that there must be times when we feel pain and emotional discomfort. However, by patiently trusting in the eternal plan, we can experience daily happiness and have hope for “ever-after happiness.”
And many of us have heard President Hinckley’s quote that “most putts don’t drop. Most beef is tough. Most children grow up to be just people. Most successful marriages require a high degree of mutual toleration. Most jobs are more often dull than otherwise. Life is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride” (“Big Rock Candy Mountains,” Deseret News, 12 June 1973, A4).
All three of these leaders have acknowledged that life is hard and often times disappointing, but not one of them failed to mention the times of joy and happiness. This brings us to a second part of the reality check: there is hope that we can overcome the bad mood and we can experience happiness in this life. Elder Packer promised that things will straighten out, Coleen Menlove explained that by patiently trusting in the eternal plan we can experience happiness daily. And president Hinckley urges us to find happiness every day as we enjoy those occasional bursts of speed and learn to enjoy the ride.

Learning to enjoy the ride leads me to the second step of my two-step process. To give or “to give thanks.”

Second: Give Thanks

Our prophet, President Hinckley, is the very example of a glad heart. In his book Standing for Something, he has written: “I am an optimist! … My plea is that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life, we ‘accentuate the positive’ ” (Standing for Something [2000], 101).

That advice “accentuate the positive” can make a big difference. Many things can have a different meaning depending on what we accentuate, or emphasize. For example, here are two possible journal entries for one of my days.

First: Today I was awakened by my crying son. I feed him probably 9 times, changed twelve diapers, and shook a rattle over him for what seemed like hours. We listened to music and I made dinner. I read my scriptures and went to bed.

On the other hand, I could have written the Journal entry like this: This morning Brayden let me sleep in until 7:30—yipee! We spent some great time together playing with his toys. I especially enjoy listening to soft music and feeding him. We had lasagna for dinner and I even had the chance to read a story about Moroni before I went to bed.

Both entries could describe the same day, depending on what I choose to emphasize. It is impossible to emphasize the positive without in turn giving thanks for what we have.

President Monson said in the Feb 2000 Ensign “ This is a wonderful time to be living here on earth. Our opportunities are limitless. While there are some things wrong in the world today, there are many thing right, such as teachers who teach, ministers who minister, marriages that make it, parents who sacrifice, and friends who help. We can lift ourselves and others as well, when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered amount the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place amount the noblets of virtues.”

President Foust in April 1990 general conference added his thoughts on gratitude: “A grateful heart is the beginning of greatness. It is an expression of humility. It is a foundation for the development of such virtues as prayer, faith, courage, contentment, happiness, love and well-being. But there is a truism associated with all types of human strength: Use it or lose it.” When not used, muscles weaken, skills deteriorate, and faith disappears.”

As we sign in Hymn #241

When upon life’s billows you are tempest tossed
When you are discouraged, think all is lost,
Count your many blessings, name them one by one,
And it will surprise you what the Lord has done.

So amid the conflict whether great or small,
Do not be discouraged God is over all.
Count your many blessings angels will attend.
Help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.

As we accentuate the positive, we cannot help but give gratitude for our many blessings. This processes of realizing our blessings can help lift us in times of the dreaded bad mood. And when we count our blessings one of our greatest blessings is knowledge of our Savior.

Third: Seek Guidance

The third step in my process is to seek help. There are several ways that we seek help in our search for happiness: including from our family, friends, good literature, and music. We are also blessed to be able to seek guidance from the most caring and powerful being: our Heavenly Father.
Elder Richard G. Scott said: “Your joy in life depends upon your trust in Heavenly Father and His holy Son, and your conviction that their plan of happiness truly can bring you joy” (“Finding Joy in Life,” Ensign, May 1996, 24).
Coleen K. Menlove said “Through the Savior we can find our way back to God. We can find peace and happiness in this life and eternal joy in the world to come. Jesus Christ, showed us the way to happiness and told us everything we need to do to be happy. As we study the teachings of the Savior and thereby understand the purpose of our existence, we feel and express our happiness.
As we come to understand the great plan of happiness, we will radiate, for all the world to see, a glad heart and a cheerful countenance. We will show that we know the gospel of Jesus Christ is a simple, ever-present source of true happiness today and ever after in eternity. It is living the gospel of Jesus Christ that is our guarantee of living happily ever after.”
The Lord has promised to help us through our difficulties He invited us “Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me: for I am meek and lowly in heart and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light (Matt.11 26-30). The Savior also promises that if we follow him through challenging times we will come closer to true happiness. For He has said: “In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).
In the story of Un-happy Horton, Horton find happiness by realizing that he is unique and special and that he can choose to be happy. I testify that to our Savior each one of us is unique. I am the only Happy Jasmine Dickerson that is just like me. And Heavenly Father knows me. He cares about me and he wants me to be happy. Each of us can find that happiness by turning to him. Although sometimes relief from the “bad mood” syndrome can be a long time in coming, I know that it can come.